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Joined: 9/1/96 Posts: 40374
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Re: Thank you all

OKI may be way off base here, but I think the timing of all your loved ones deaths may just be that you were there at the right time and really nothing more. Maybe it was about YOU, for you to take this on for some personal reason. To be there when a loved one takes their last breath is the closest thing we come to in our own spiritual journey to understanding the reality of life and death.

I always heard the loved ones sometimes like to go when they are alone because they feel they cannot leave and feel the pain of those left behind.

Our family was with our Dad most of the day on the Sunday he died but went home to have dinner, etc. No one told us they expected him to just die even though we knew he was failing. They called and said he took a turn and we rushed back but none of us got there in time..just a few minutes after he passed. But a few days before his blood pressure was very low and they didn't know if he would hang on and I sat with him and held his hand and did my "healing" thing with my warm hands on his forehead and the nurses were amazed that he rallied and his blood pressure came back up. But finally, I realized I couldn't hang onto him and I couldn't hold him back and I cried to my brother that I would have to let him go. That was Thursday and he passed on Sunday.

My Mom was different. I knew she was ready and when she had an internal bleed Sunday morning and they gave her morphine, I left for part of the day, with the rest of the family with her and returned later and called our sons who came to see her one last time. It was obvious she wasn't going to make it but it was a few hours later when her breathing changed and became soft, like a breeze. The nurses told me that was a sign so I called everyone and my one brother and SIL made it in time but others didn't. I finally told her it was ok for her to go and be with the family and ok to go "home".

The thing I remember the most is that once they take that last breath and their heart stops beating, they become like an empty shell. That life force is gone, zip, and what is left is just empty. To me, I felt even though they were no longer in their body. they were on their way to another place or plain
, etc.

Of course, I am a believer and that is what keeps me going that all my loved ones are where I call"that most beautiful place" and we will be together again.

One last thing.we were not able to be with Jason at the end, but I learned his body was shutting down and it was a matter of hours. We did all we could here, we said our final prayers for a person that is leaving, "last rites", and it was very, very spiritual and we felt Jason was with us. I woke up around 4AM and used the restroom and then got back in bed and said to my parents"Mom, Dad, are you all gathering? It's time to go get Jason." And, I went to sleep. I learned later from Michelle he passed after 5AM their time which is an hour ahead of us. I know Jason was not alone on this side, Michelle was with him and he was not alone on the other sidethey came for him and he went with them, peacefully.

I am sorry that you lost your sister and I understand your feelings of being so alone. But you have your children and grand children and you will make new friends if you open yourself up to it. Also, a milestone birthday is something we have to cope with. Bob just turned 74 and he's already thinking about "time". I've been thinking about it for the last five years since Jason passed away.

Take care Bill.
[Post edited by Gateway at 02/06/2018 9:18PM]

(In response to this post by buffdad)

Posted: 02/06/2018 at 2:53PM


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Current Thread:
Spiritual question -- buffdad 02/06/2018 12:40AM
  Thank you all -- buffdad 02/06/2018 2:24PM
  Re: Thank you all -- Gateway 02/06/2018 2:53PM
  There are many things I can say about this... -- Gateway 02/06/2018 1:17PM
  I'll give it a spin. -- Portland 02/06/2018 1:07PM
  Thanks.... meaningful words ** -- buffdad 02/06/2018 2:09PM
  Seems very possible to me -- cu2x 02/06/2018 10:29AM
  Want to add -- cu2x 02/06/2018 10:32AM
  I understand.... ** -- buffdad 02/06/2018 2:10PM
  Must be hard for you -- BarkingDogBuff 02/06/2018 09:57AM